Somebody To Love (Ryker Falls Book 1) Page 8
“No point, when you’re already on one.” He was enjoying holding her, so he wasn’t letting her go until he had to.
“Piper, Jack, and Luke live in the main house. We added on a place at the rear for Aunt Jess, but she’s out of town at the moment.”
Joe loved that house. First, because it had once belonged to the woman in his arms, and had a very special place they’d both shared on the property, and second because it had brought the Trainer siblings together through blood, sweat, and a whole lot of swearing. They’d learned about each other, the people they really were, not the people their father had turned them into.
“It looks good, Joe. Don’t you live there too?”
“No, I need my space.” He couldn’t live that close to someone again and not go crazy.
“Because you had to share with your brothers for so long?”
“Something like that,” he said, not surprised she knew the reasons why. She’d always been able to do that. In fact, he’d once thought that Bailey knew him better than he knew himself.
“D-did you learn to ride a Harley, Joe, and get out of Ryker?”
He remembered the day they’d discussed dreams, and that had been one of his.
“Actually, I did ride a Harley for a while, but not here.”
“What did you do?”
“Do?”
“Between then and now?”
“I got into some trouble after you left, Bailey. Me and some others raised hell in this town until my aunt and the Robbins sisters stepped in and sent me away to this ranch in Texas. It changed my life. Had I stayed, I would have ended up in jail.”
“What kind of trouble?”
“Drink, drugs, and stealing. Pretty much anything I could find. I roped a few others in with me. One of them was Dylan Howard, which goes a long way into explaining his mother’s hatred of me.” He didn’t add that Bailey leaving him had pretty much been the final straw for Joe. Their father was taken away for possession and put inside, and they’d never seen him again. No loss, but still a change, and then Aunt Jess had arrived. Within six months of Bailey leaving, Joe’s life had turned on its head. He’d reacted with violence and a path to self-destruction.
She processed that silently for a while, trying to fill in the gaps as he did with her, about where they’d been and what had happened in their lives.
“I’m sorry things got bad for you, Joe.”
“In a way maybe I had to go bad, to turn out good... or at least better.”
He nudged his horse around the large stables and along another driveway through the trees, with Buzz ambling at their side. Occasionally something would catch his eye, and he’d race off, but he soon returned.
She touched his ring, one finger. “I remember you told me once that jewelry was for girls. Did someone give it to you?”
“I bought it actually.” He didn’t add that it was special to him because just looking at it had reminded him of her.
They climbed, and Bailey was soon pressed into his chest, and Joe tightened the arm around her waist, holding her still as she tried to put some distance between them.
“I’m glad your aunt and the others were there to help you.”
“Me too.”
“They’re nice, Miss Marla and Miss Sarah, and a little scary.”
“A lot scary. They just give me that look and I’m back in school.”
She snuffled. Not a laugh, but close.
“And that’s why you taste the tea, and do whatever they ask you?”
“I like the tea thing, because with it usually comes a scone with cream and jam, plus I’m competitive, and me beating them keeps them on their toes.”
“It’s nice that you care about them, Joe.”
“Who do you care about?”
“People. You don’t know them.”
He couldn’t see her face, so he had no clue if she was telling the truth.
“Don’t make the mistake of feeling sorry for me, Joe. I have everything I want in my life, and I don’t need that from you, or anyone. Just because I’m not talkative like I used to be, simply means I’ve grown up.”
“How do you know I’m feeling sorry for you?”
“A hunch.”
An accurate one actually, but it was more worry than pity.
“I’m sorry I let you down by not returning your letters.”
“I got the hint after a while, so don’t worry about it.”
“I know that, because my aunt stopped forwarding them to me.”
He’d read each of those letters at least three times, but Joe had never replied because he’d let Bailey down, and hadn’t known how to tell her. He had also believed she was better off without him in her life. However, he’d been devastated when she’d stopped writing.
Neither of them spoke again, and Joe thought that was enough revelations for one day. He held her as they reached the top of the drive, and there was his house. He loved the big house, but this... well, this was the place that held his heart. Made of cedar and stone, it was clad like many of the other houses around Ryker, but this was his haven.
“Oh, it’s lovely,” Bailey breathed.
Here the water from the river that flowed down from the falls, narrowed and passed by the front of his house. He’d built a bridge to drive over.
“My rooms are up there,” Joe pointed to the top floor, where a window ran floor to ceiling and just as wide. “I can see the town lights, and the mountains. Sometimes when the wind is blowing the right way, I can hear the falls. It’s....” His words fell away as he tried to explain what this place meant to him.
“Your sanctuary.”
It was a sanctuary for him, and because she’d once lived here, perhaps that was more of a reason why.
“It must be nice to have all your family here with you?”
“Sure. When I came back, Luke had gone, but I soon found him, and Jack was in the next town over. Aunt Jess and Pip had stayed.”
“Did you ever go there? To the cave?” Her words were soft, wistful.
“No. After you left, I never went back, and haven’t to this day. Maybe one day soon you could go there with me?”
Her messy bun brushed his chin as she shook her head. He wondered what she’d do if he released all that blonde hair and ran his fingers through it.
“I think the past is better left there, Joe.”
“Where do you call home usually, Bailey? Where is your sanctuary?” Joe wondered if she’d fulfilled that part of her dream, and found a place to lay her heart.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
“ I’ve been moving around for a while now.”
“That’s got to be hard, not having your things around you?”
She shrugged. “You get used to it. When I was performing, I would live out of a suitcase for months.”
“But you have to put down roots sometime, right? The Bailey I knew had one day wanted that.”
“Plans change” was all she said.
“What about your brother, Beau? I don’t remember much about him, as he was older, but where is he?”
“Paris. He’s been there for years.”
“And you miss him.”
“Of course, but his life is there, and mine isn’t.”
“Do you think you’ll go back to playing professionally? You must have plans where you’re heading?”
“I don’t know.”
Joe just bet that was a lie. Bailey had always planned everything.
“But you have an idea, I know you do.”
“I don’t want to talk about it. Please take me back now.”
Her back was rigid again.
“So I have to slice open a vein, but you don’t?”
“Unlike your story, mine is long and boring, and I have no wish to recount it. Plus, I didn’t ask you to slice open a vein, you did that all by yourself.”
“I don’t remember you being such a hard-ass.”
She snorted. “I wish. Had I been a hard-ass, life would have definitely
been smoother.”
“Why was it bumpy?”
She didn’t answer.
“How did you hurt your arm?”
“An accident, I told you. I fell through a window. My hand took the impact.”
“It looks bad.”
“It was. For a time they wondered if I’d play again.”
Joe wondered who’d held her, and sat at her bedside while she recovered. Who told her that everything would be all right.
“And yet you can, so that’s a relief.”
She sighed, a soft little sad sound, but didn’t say anything further. He didn’t push, instead he said, “I have your Carnegie Hall concert on my iPod.”
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” he said in the same polite tone.
He turned them round, and retraced their steps, this time heading to the outbuildings.
“I thought you might like to hug a few more horses, seeing as you’re all tense again.” Joe stopped inside the stables.
“I’m not tense.”
“If this is you not tense, I can only imagine what you’re like when you are,” he said, dismounting. He grabbed her around the waist before she could argue, and pulled her down. “Funny how you used to tell me to relax, and now it’s you who needs that advice.”
“A little warning,” she said, bracing her hands on his chest. “And there is nothing wrong with my everyday state.”
Joe could feel the warmth of her palms, and then they were gone and she was stepping away from him.
“A little on the skinny side, but I have to say that your everyday state works for me.” He looked over her fitted black designer jeans, and pale blue cotton shirt. On her feet were peach sneakers.
“I’m not skinny.”
“You are a bit. But it shouldn’t take long to fill out the hollows in those cheeks, especially if you keep eating those donuts, and a few of the teashop scones.”
“Are you deliberately trying to insult me?” She dragged her eyes from the stalls, where the horses who weren’t out in the fields were hanging out of their boxes.
“I’m deliberately trying to get a reaction out of you. Is it working?”
“No.”
He laughed as she walked away from him to the closest horse. Buzz, he noted, had followed, which was interesting. His dog had certainly taken to Bailey.
“This place can house twenty horses in the winter.” Joe kept pace with her. “We have an indoor arena through those doors at the rear. Jack mainly does the work, and from here he runs trail rides, or gives lessons, with the help of the staff. Nice shoes, by the way,” he added.
“I like them.”
“I guess that’s all that matters then.”
She stopped and looked down at her feet. “What’s wrong with my footwear?”
“They’re peach.” Joe led her to the first horse.
“I happen to like peach.”
“Well, good for you, and so do I, but I like to eat mine.”
“Or wash your hair in it,” Bailey said, stepping up to the stall, and holding out a hand.
“Oh now that had a kick to it. Nice work, Bailey.”
She ignored him.
“That’s Arthur, as in King, because he thinks he’s the head dog around here.”
“Or horse, as the case may be,” she said. “Hello, lovely, you’re definitely a big boy, aren’t you.”
Joe watched as she fussed over Arthur, the horse all but purring as he lowered his head and she scratched him behind one ear.
“He’ll keep you there all day.”
“I don’t mind.”
She gave him a kiss on the nose, and Joe was sure he saw stars in the horse’s eyes as they left.
He took her around each horse, and she gave them the same treatment. He then showed her the tack room, the storage rooms, the indoor arena, and lastly up the stairs to the offices.
“This is the bunk room for any of the casuals who come in when it’s busy. We also have a few kids in to stay and learn the ropes now and again.”
“Local kids?”
“Sure, and out of towners.”
She gave him a look. “Kids who need a bit of help straightening out?”
“You always were a smart girl.”
“You’re giving those kids what you, Luke, and Jack never had.”
He was, they all were, because they’d had help when they needed it, but some kids didn’t get so lucky.
“It’s the right thing to do,” Bailey said.
Why those six simple words made his heart feel warm he had no idea, but they did.
“We thought so. Just need to get the rec center passed now, and there will be another place for them to go.”
“Maggs was telling me about that. It sounds amazing.” Her eyes lit with interest. “The town should be behind it.”
“Some are, some aren’t. Why do you think it’s amazing?”
“We would have used it back then, and it would have been warm and dry, and had adults there who maybe could have helped you and your brothers, Joe.”
He nodded. Joe had thought just that when he’d started putting the proposal together. “We would have,” he said, watching her walk around the space.
There were four sets of bunks, and an open-plan kitchen/dining area, with a lounge and bathroom facilities through separate doors.
Bailey came back to where he stood.
“It’s like a different property to the one I grew up on. You must be very proud of what you and your family have achieved here.”
“We are. It took a lot of work, especially as we’d been apart for so long, but we got there eventually.”
“How long were you away?”
“Eight years on and off. I came back whenever I could.”
He saw the questions in her eyes, but she didn’t ask where he’d been for those years.
“I’m glad you showed me around, Joe. Thank you, but I should get going now. I’ll save the ride for another day.”
She went to walk around Joe, but he cut her off by stepping into her path. “Are you scared of me, Bailey?”
She looked up at him, her expression controlled.
“No. But it’s time for me to leave, Joe.”
“I think you are scared, but what really terrifies you is that I make you feel things you don’t want to feel.”
“Step aside, please.”
He didn’t, couldn’t; instead he stepped closer.
“I’d never hurt you, Bailey, you don’t need to be afraid with me.”
“I know that.”
“How do you know that?” He cupped her cheek, running his thumb over the soft, heated skin.
“Because the boy you were was far more dangerous that the man before me.”
“That kind of makes sense.”
“Plus, the anger I’ve carried toward you was unjustified, I know that now, and maybe I carried it for so long because I wasn’t happy. Whatever the reason, some of what you explained today has helped me understand why you didn’t write back.”
“But only some?”
“Let me go, Joe.”
Never.
“I didn’t want to disappoint you,” he said. “You wanted me to be the best I could be, and I hadn’t done that. In fact, I’d done the opposite.”
“It’s done. We can move on now.”
“Can we move on as friends?”
“Joe, my life is one hell of a big mess right now, and I really don’t need any more complications.”
“I wasn’t always a complication, I was a friend.”
“But you’re not now. You’re a man, not the boy I knew. Not the boy who needed me. You’re a man who unsettles me, and I don’t want or need that.”
“At least you’re being honest.”
“So you understand, we could never be.... Let’s just be acquaintances,” she said, changing her mind about the words she’d been about to say.
“Lovers, Bailey?”
“Acquaintances.”
“I’m not sure I can keep my distance from you.”
“Joe, d-don’t....” Her words fell away as his lips touched her neck.
“I’ve wanted my hands on you since I first saw you in the grocery store, Bailey Jones.” He whispered the words into her ear, before moving in to place more kisses on her neck. “What I once felt for you was innocent and pure; this, however, this is different.”
She shivered. It rolled through her body. She arched back into the hand around her waist, allowing Joe better access to her neck. He kissed and licked, then decided he wanted her mouth.
He took it slow, but deep, drawing a response from Bailey as she opened to allow him in. Joe’s head started to spin; he lost his grasp on reality, and enjoyed the feel of her.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Bailey shuddered as she leaned into him. No one had held her as if she mattered for years. Not even Clark had made her feel this way with just a touch.
Her head was spinning, her body pressing into his; she wanted this, needed this, and hadn’t even known it.
“God, you’re sweet.” His hands wrapped around her back as he pulled her into his hard chest; his lips took hers again, even deeper, more intense. She held on to him, wrapping her arms around his neck. Heat travelled through her, turning her limbs to liquid and pooling in places it had never pooled before. She had to stop—before she couldn’t.
“No, Joe.” She wrenched free and stumbled backward. “This cannot happen.”
“Why?” He was tense as he looked at her, those green eyes darker with the flare of heat she’d put there. Ignoring the little zing of pleasure that thought gave her, she took another step back. The man radiated lust and forbidden dreams. He was the forbidden, and in his arms Bailey knew she’d find serious sexual fulfilment, but little else. She didn’t need more complications in her life, especially not with him. He was experienced, she was not; if she wasn’t careful he’d break her heart all over again.
“Because I don’t do that,” she said, crossing her arms over her waist. “It’s not who I am, Joe, and you should know that about me.”
“You were thirteen, Bailey, how the hell do I know who you are now? The woman before me is nothing like the girl you were.”
“I’m not... loose.”
“You think I am?”